singing in general conference.

I'll just start out this post with this video, a clip from one of my favorite Spongebob episodes. (yes, I'm 19. yes, I still enjoy Spongebob. yes, I am very immature.)

Spongebob seeing himself in this commercial is how I felt this past weekend. all women who participate in the BYU choirs and some choir alumni got to sing at the General Women's session of LDS general conference. this has actually been a lifelong dream of mine, to sing in a general conference session. ever since I was young, one of my favorite things about conference weekend was watching the Mormon Tabernacle Choir perform and look for the people with the weirdest hairdos. I wondered what my hair would look like when I got to sing on TV, what I would wear, what I would sing, and how old I would be. I thought I would be closer to 59 than 19. but I guess I chose the right year to audition for BYU Women's Chorus, because WE were selected to sing at the general women's session this spring!

so, in case you ever wondered what it's like to sing in the conference center, in Salt Lake, in front of a live audience of 21,000 people, and even more watching online or on television, here you go:

(and of course, this is the best account you'll ever read because...you know...I'm honest.)

the BYU women's chorus started rehearsing for general conference in around October. when I found out that we would be performing 3 pieces + a congregational hymn in the General Women's Session, I was so excited. I couldn't believe that I could have this opportunity at such a young age. I mean, yes, I made it into an audition-only university choir as an alto 2 (for all you non choir people: this means I sing the lower alto part, so basically the bass part in a women's chorus). yes, I was one of 22 members of the madrigal choir my senior year of high school. yes, I have perfect pitch. yes, I sang Bohemian Rhapsody from memory in front of my 5th grade class at a karaoke party. but I didn't feel like I was conference material. I didn't feel worthy. and to be honest, we sounded pretty rough at first. there were moments when we were rehearsing that I wondered if we could even pull it off. and not only did I have to learn really low alto parts to 3 songs that I was already familiar with, I had to learn to sing them expressively. and being expressive in a performance is actually something I struggle with. on more than one occasion, the judges of my piano competitions told me that I was a technically great pianist, but I wasn't "emotional enough". I wasn't moving all over the keyboard, and I just wasn't "feeling" it. I was completely stiff. even though I did feel emotionally connected inside, I just couldn't show it. but when you are singing in conference, you have to look like you are bearing your testimony. and I tried, but it wasn't easy. but (as you will see later), we were able to pull it off.

something you might know about is the dress code. our wonderful director, Jean Applonie (someone misspelled her name in a hashtag on twitter as #JeanAppolenoie), chose the color scheme. basically, we didn't want to cause a heart attack.

Shout out to whoever picked the wardrobe for this year's choir. Finally some colors that don't cause a heart attack #womensconf #LDSConf

— Madeline Marie (@oymadelinemarie) March 26, 2017

Well, #JeanAppolenoie decided on a "narrow scope of jewel tones: medium to dark hues of blue, turquoise, green, and purple", and we either had to wear a solid dress, or a solid top with a black skirt. we could choose any of those colors, but if it was too light, we would have to select something else. dress/skirts had to be at least knee length when both standing and sitting, and if you did choose to wear an undershirt, it had to be either black or the same color as the shirt, because anything light would look bad on camera. for me, I had a hard time finding anything that fit the criteria, but then my mom picked out my dress as a late birthday present, and I loved it. it was perfect, and it was approved by the wardrobe committee. oh, and we had to do TV makeup and there were certain requirements for hairdos as well. no large buns on top of the head (we didn't want to block the girl behind us), and it had to look nice. nothing too fancy, but it had to be classy.

In order to get some good practice performances, we performed each of the songs at our fall concert and in BYU devotionals. after a few extra rehearsals outside of class, we finally felt like we were ready. (I ate half a pizza and drank a 32 ounce Diet Coke after our last out-of-class rehearsal before we went to Salt Lake. I needed to celebrate somehow.)

THE BIG DAY

I woke up, showered, got in my dress, and did my stage makeup before 11:00 am. then, my mom picked me up from my apartment and brought me home to do my hair. I had to be back at BYU at 1 in order to get on the bus. our plan was to arrive in Salt Lake at 2:30, but because it was raining and rain freaks everyone out for some reason, it took longer. on the bus, the WC presidency told us to prepare ourselves spiritually for this performance. most girls either read scriptures or studied their music. I knew that the only thing that would calm me down and get me focused was putting in my earphones and blasting Bohemian Rhapsody. (some people have different levels of spirituality, okay?!) we arrived at around 3 at the conference center in Salt Lake. we went through an entrance that I had never seen before, and it led us to a rehearsal theater. we did a quick warmup in there, and then section by section, we went up to the LOFT, which is where the choir would sing during the meeting! I was in section C, row 1, seat 1. right behind the organist. (why is it a thing to stick the 5 foot altos behind the organ? but it turned out to be a prime spot.) we did a soundcheck, went over some rules, went back to the theater to eat dinner, touch up our makeup, and went back to the loft for another sound/camera check. then, it was GO TIME.

I had been to 2 sessions of general conference in my life prior to this. the first one was a general women's session when I was 15 in March, and the second one was a Sunday afternoon session in October (I was still 15). seeing conference live has always been a cool experience, but it was a lot different sitting in the loft and having to watch the speakers on a tiny screen. Bonnie L. Oscarson, the general Young Women's president, opened the meeting. SHE IS SO COOL AND SHE ALWAYS GIVES GREAT TALKS. and then, for REAL, it was go time.

our opening song was "Come O, Thou King of Kings". (see if you can find me! also, I have this really cool, low alto part and I got to go full chest voice on it. it was great.)

then, after the opening prayer, we sang "I Feel My Savior's Love" (I AM IN THE FREAKING PREVIEW FOR THIS ONE GUYS THIS IS REAL)

my mom, her sister, and her sister-in-law all got tickets to this session. however, because no one knows how to handle rain here and the security people were going nuts and trying to dry off everyone's umbrella, they missed my first 2 songs, which are really the only ones where you can see me in the video. my mom spent the whole time trying to look for me, but since she was far away, it was unsuccessful. I tried to look for her in the audience, but I couldn't find her, either.

oh, and the congregational hymn was kinda a wreck. usually, they show the words on the screen so that everyone can sing them. but for whatever reason, they forgot to do it this time. NO ONE KNEW THE WORDS. and I tried to BS the alto part as best as I could. (I even practiced while fixing my makeup.) but...it was a struggle, but we pulled it off.

all the talks were amazing. to be honest, the general women's session isn't always my favorite meeting, but ALL the talks were great this time. I was actually paying attention to each one and focusing on the speaker, rather than the fact that I was sitting in front of 21,000 people. I put a link to the talks at the beginning of this post, and if you haven't read or listened to them yet, you should!

the closing song, "My Heavenly Father Loves Me" was my favorite one. it was one of my favorite songs when I was in primary, and it had a gorgeous alto part (do I act like all I care about is the alto part? well, I'm sorry. sometimes I feel like we are under appreciated). singing this song especially felt amazing, because it was the last one, and I felt really peaceful instead of nervous. I could feel my Savior's love for me, and I knew that my Heavenly Father loved me (yes, I'm being cliché, but IT WAS TRUE, OK?!). I have always felt the spirit strongly through music, and that's how I like to share my testimony. there is a line in my patriarchal blessing that mentions using my musical gifts to share the gospel, and I was definitely doing that. I felt so grateful that God blessed me with my voice, my piano skills, and the opportunity to sing in this choir.

after the closing prayer was said, President Henry B. Eyring and President Dieter F. Uchtdorf both turned around and waved at us, and then they gave us a thumbs up! I FELT SO APPRECIATED. then, Dieter's wife, Harriet, gave him a hug and waved at us, too, and I felt so much love from them. and THEN all of the Young Women's presidency, primary presidency, and Relief Society presidency came UP TO THE LOFT to tell us what a great job we did. IN PERSON. and of course, I said "thank you." they are all so kind, and I could feel their love for me and each member of the choir. it was surreal.

we weren't allowed to leave until after all the general authorities were gone, and most of the audience was gone, too. I went home with my mom and my aunts instead of going back on the bus. I could tell they were all so proud of me, even though they weren't able to see me (we later watched a recording on TV and then they could all see me). 2 days later, I still can't believe that I had the opportunity to sing at a general conference session, and I will always be grateful for it! I know that the gospel is true, and that music is a very powerful way of sharing it.

 the whole choir at rehearsal

 my brothers and my dad recorded it just so they could see me. Wesley got pretty excited.

 and here is the back of my head!

Castles take DC part 3 (FINALLY)

17-38, ayyyyyyyyy, I'm like hey what's up hellooooo.... so we are finally at part 3 of our DC trip. this was probably the least eventful part of our trip, or the part that I don't want to remember. even in the dry desert of Utah, I still get annoying seasonal allergies. we can't buy real live Christmas trees anymore because I have developed a reaction to them over the years. my mom always plants these beautiful smelling lilies which we can no longer keep in the living room because my eyes start watering (and then drying out) as soon as I enter the room. and remember, this is just the desert. in the DC area, it is really humid. and EVERYTHING IS GREEN. so finally, on Friday, I wake up and I'm completely congested, I can't see because my eyes were watery (and then of course, they dried out), and I'm miserable. well, we had to leave early to get to the Reagan National airport and rent a car to drive all over Virginia, and the only thing we could get at the CVS pharmacy was this really high-strength generic equivalent to Benadryl. so I was really tired and sleepy and loopy all day. add some caffeine to the mix and......yeah. it was just weird.

our first destination was Mt. Vernon, home of none other than the Father of our Country, George Washington. if there is anything you need to know about the DC area, George Washington is seen as the precedent for everything. he is regarded with so much respect and if you have anything to say against him, then you need to leave. never mind the fact that he had a few slaves and our family got to go inside the slave cabin. HE WAS THE GOAT. (Greatest Of All Time.) it was a bit chilly that day and I was feeling like crap, so I just had to endure that part. but it was really cool to see the decorating style of the house. all the walls were painted in ridiculously bright colors. (we didn't take any pictures inside.) there was also lots of farm land. he had a 16 sided barn (which I don't remember the purpose of because I wasn't completely conscious), and there are still cows and horses and sheep. I don't know why they are there because this is literally a restored tourist attraction, but I guess it was to make it more authentic?

after Mt. Vernon, we were only supposed to drive 2.5 hours to Monticello, Virginia, where Thomas Jefferson lived. our plan was to go to a grocery store, buy some deli sandwiches, and eat them at some park halfway there because we were tired of eating out. but that plan didn't work. so to anyone who doesn't know already, Utah basically has 2 seasons: winter and road construction. pretty much all the major roads in Provo are closed off all summer, making it inconvenient to get anywhere. and the stretch of I-15 from the point of the mountain to Salt Lake is literal hell. but the next time I have to drive to Salt Lake during construction season, I won't be complaining. because the ENTIRE FREEWAY was under construction, and we were barely moving. it took 30 minutes just to go 10 miles. now THIS WAS LITERAL HELL. it took about 2 hours just to get halfway there, and my brothers and I are crammed in the back of this small rental car, and Wesley (who has the longest legs) is in the middle. since finding a random park to stop at was completely out of the picture at this point, Wesley decided to be really annoying and eat his salad in the car and jab me with his elbow every 5 seconds. so I was ready to die. but THANKFULLY the Benadryl did its magic and I was out cold from that point on.

of course, we were late to our tour at Monticello. but the ticket people were really understanding and let us catch up with our tour in the middle of it. our tour guide was really funny and entertaining. this house was a bit more spacious than Mt. Vernon, and it had a weird layout. a lot of the rooms were shaped like octagons. again I don't really remember much of this part because I was in survival mode and my mom decided she wanted to make us all miserable and tour the entire garden, the wine press, the outdoor bathrooms, and the museum at the end. I feel bad for anyone who was trying to visit Thomas Jefferson because his house was so freaking far away from everything, and it was at the top of a hill. but I did learn some interesting facts about Thomas Jefferson. on his gravestone, he did not want it to say "3rd President of the United States". instead, it said "Here was buried Thomas Jefferson, Author of the Declaration of American Independence, Of the Statute of Virginia for religious freedom, & Father of the University of Virginia." those were the 3 things he wanted to be remembered for the most. also, Monticello is pronounced like Monty-Cello, not "Monty-sello", which is the way that the small podunk town in Utah is pronounced.

OH and how can I forget the moment when I was washing my hands in the bathroom at Monticello and in walks Wesley, completely unaware that he's in the wrong bathroom. then at the same time, I scream "GET OUT!" and he screams "THERE AREN'T ANY URINALS!" and leaves. but the reason this is so funny is because Justin walked into the women's restroom TWICE in Hawaii, realized there were no urinals, and ran out screaming.

we took one picture.

afterward I was feeling a little bit better and we ate at Five Guys in Charlottesville and drove 2 more hours to Williamsburg and stayed at a hotel there. Wesley was the only one who brought a swimsuit and decided to hit the pool at 9:30 pm.

the first thing I saw when I left the hotel room was a shirtless dude, smoking, blasting country music. I guess that's a normal thing in Virginia. that day we went to Colonial Williamsburg, the original capital of Virginia. we got to tour all these restored buildings, the Governor's Mansion, the printing press, the magazine (where all the weapons are kept), the jail, and the original capitol building. my mom asked the tour guide how the colonists were able to hang the chandelier in the center of the room if they were so short, and she literally said, "I only answer important questions." so the world will never know how the chandelier was lit every day in the capitol building, because it wasn't important. we also went to the art museum and found a display of all these old pianos. back then, there weren't nearly as many keys and there weren't pedals, so that explains why Baroque music doesn't use very much of the keyboard. I'm grateful that pianos were able to develop much more in the next century because most of the music I like to play is....all over the keyboard. but it was really cool to see all the ancient pianos. my mom forced us all to look at the old dishes, and after we finally dragged her out of the place, we headed back toward Baltimore.

 the Governor's Mansion had a lot of guns. believe me. a lot of guns.

so no one needs to hear the run down of our drive back to Baltimore, but we got to our hotel at about 9:30 pm. when we got to our room, there was literally 1 King sized bed and a chair. we all just looked at each other and said "there is NO WAY we are all fitting in here" and went back down to the lobby and explained how there were 3 adults and 2 kiddos and that we couldn't fit in that room, and then the guy at the front desk explained that the online system wasn't working properly, but that he couldn't get a suite for us because they were all full, but we could get a different room with a king sized bed AND a folding couch bed, so it would still be really snug but it would have to do. we resorted to sticking the 3 adults on the king sized bed, Wesley on the folding couch bed, and Justin on the cushions on the ground. this was less than ideal because I'm the one who always gets my own bed, but we were coming home the next day, so we all just had to suck it up and go to sleep, because we had to be at the airport at 5 am.

OK SO THE NEXT PART OF THE STORY SUCKS but it is finally almost over. we all woke up at 4:40, gathered up all our crap, and got to the BWI airport at around 5. our flight wasn't supposed to leave until 8:30 AM but my dad had a conference in Rhode Island that he had to go to, and his flight left for JFK at 6:30 so it was just easier to all get to the airport at the same time. I was super grumpy and tired and waiting for our flight seemed like eternity. well, we finally boarded our flight to Minneapolis at 8 ish and we were supposed to take off at 8:30, get to Minneapolis at around 10 ish, have a 45 minute layover and fly to SLC and get there at around 1 pm. but this was a newer plane, and there was ONE oxygen mask that wouldn't pull down, so the maintenance people had to come try and fix it. also, Delta decided to freaking replay the same song 5 TIMES IN A ROW (I think it was called With Every Beat of My Heart or something?) and let me say it again, it was literal hell. once the music stopped, it was better. but we ended up taking off at least an hour later than we were expected to, and the flight attendant was trying to be optimistic about trying to make sure we all got our connections, but right before we landed, he said "everyone who is going to Salt Lake, you missed your flight.....we will get tickets for the next one." so we had 3 extra hours to waste at the Minneapolis airport before our new flight to SLC left. needless to say I was in a really bad mood. I was jet lagged, I had been up since 4:40 am (2:40 am Utah time), and I just wanted to get home. we finally arrived in Salt Lake at dinnertime.

again, I apologize for this post being the least exciting of the 3, and to be honest most of it just consists of me complaining about how much I hate driving all day and being stuck at airports (except being stuck at the Narita Airport in Tokyo and going through all the stupid security lines and ATMs and getting our subway passes and waiting in more lines and spending about 4 hours there was possibly the worst day of my life). but I honestly loved going to DC and learning more about our country and my appreciation of American history has grown. and if you take anything from this, just..don't connect. even though flying straight through from SLC to Baltimore is more expensive. it saves a lot more time,

have a great day everyone!

things I can only say after graduating

well guys. I did it. I graduated from Timpview High School with honors and AP scholar cords. (this means I took x number of AP tests and got 3's on all of them? I don't even know. but it's a big enough deal to get me some cords.) the ceremony was....long. I'm pretty sure it was great, but considering the fact that people with ADHD don't do well in long ceremonies whatsoever, I lost my patience 5 minutes in. but it was probably wonderful for those humans who actually have an attention span. everyone has asked me how it feels to be a graduate. to be honest, it's mostly just weird and now I have to find a job and learn how to do everything for myself before I move out. but I thought I would share some pieces of advice, some good experiences, some embarrassing experiences, some mistakes and regrets, and what I will take and leave from my senior year of high school. if you are looking for a sentimental post about how life moves pretty fast, if you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it, then this isn't the place. (I LOVE Ferris Bueller, but this isn't the place to be mushy.) so, without further ado:

HOW TO DO SENIOR YEAR (or life in general) RIGHT

1. GO TO CLASS. JUST DO IT. OK? it is a really hard habit to break, and making up assignments is not worth it. I would give you guys a lecture, but I want to be nice. Don't pull a Ferris Bueller every day.

2. Not all underclassmen are evil, brainless scum. these 2 girls, Grace and Nicole, have become 2 of my best friends for life. and they are a year younger than me. since there was only 1 other senior on the tennis team, I was spending a lot of time with juniors. and they are great people. I was their age once, and it is fun to give advice and talk to them about how to survive junior year (which is the hardest academically), because hanging around seniors who only want to talk about college can get old after a while. many seniors get an attitude that they are better than everyone because they are seniors, but please don't do that. the younger years look up to you. if I was a snobby senior, then Nicole wouldn't be able to text me "let's play tennis" and be at a court in 5 minutes, and Grace wouldn't have anyone to scream The Killers or Michael Jackson or Queen songs with her in the car.

3. Make new friends, but keep the old.  my senior year, I ended up hanging out with a lot of the people that I went to elementary school with, and it was just so fun to reminisce with them about Rock Canyon Elementary school and being rebels on the playground by annoying the recess guards, the 5th grade kickball tournament, singing all 6 minutes of Bohemian Rhapsody at the 5th grade karaoke party just to prove that I knew all the words, the 6th grade student teacher with weird eyebrows who smelled funny, the medieval feast, and all the other good times that I can't name off the top of my head. I went to homecoming with the boy who got in trouble for taking off his shoes in first grade. I also went to Sadie Hawkins, Prom, and Last Chance with boys I had known since elementary school, and it was so much fun to experience high school with the people who I grew up with. so, while new friends are great, there is just something fun about growing up with people!

4. Don't let rankings define you. when people would ask me how I was doing in tennis, I would say, "Really great! I've only lost to Orem and that one girl in St George!" and then they would say "so you're almost undefeated! what's your ranking?" and I would say, "3rd JV singles." and if they were ignorant, they would say, "but if you're that good, you should play varsity!" well, that's not how tennis works. EVERY SPOT ON THE TEAM is important. we all have to try out best! being 3rd JV singles is a very important position. if one of the 2 JV singles girls ranked higher than me wins, but the other one loses, then it's up to me to get that JV singles win! just because I'm not on varsity doesn't mean I have to lose! when I was in St George with the Varsity and the rest of competing JV,  one of the workers at the country club was watching me beat this girl 6-0, 6-2 and then asked me what school I went to. I said, "Timpview" and she said, "so that's why you're playing JV! Timpview's varsity is exceptional, and when JV has players as good as you, then that says a lot about the rest of the team. you have a solid team!" so moral of the story, no matter what ranking you are, no matter what position you play, do your best because YOU ARE IMPORTANT!

5. BE CLUTCH. being clutch means to perform well, even under pressure. I had a hard time with this my sophomore season, but by my senior season I got pretty good at being clutch. but the key to being clutch is not to focus on the pressure, and to get in the zone. my most devastating loss was not because my opponent outplayed me, not because I was tired, but because I wasn't clutch. it was a really hot day in St. George, and it was at 2:30, the hottest time of the day. my opponent had just played another match before me, and I thought I could wear her out. but since I was under that pressure to wear her out, I kept missing. she actually almost forfeited due to heat exhaustion, so I thought it would be a really easy win. I was more consistent, my form was better. but I wasn't clutch. I froze. and she beat me. and I cried more about losing than she did about heat exhaustion (which was a lot.) so be clutch, in sports, performances, and on tests. don't give in to the pressure!

6. Go to football games. go to basketball games. go to whatever sport you can. go to orchestra concerts. JUST SHOW YOUR SUPPORT. YOU WILL REGRET STAYING AT HOME. but sometimes, if you have too much homework, then stay home.

7. Don't tell cheerleaders that their sport isn't a sport. they will hate you forever. (I never did this, but I watched it happen.) many of them can't even hold a tennis racket correctly, but they can do a back handspring, which I have never been able to do. I was able to get away with pretending I was a cheerleader for 20 minutes for my senior prank though!

8. Sometimes you crash the car; sometimes you get crashed into. This was not an easy lesson to learn, and I had to give my dad the car for a few days until I was able to prove that I could drive responsibly and clean up the paint scrapes. to make a long story short, I had never gotten in an accident since I got my license. then one day, when I was driving home from tennis, I hit one car in the parking lot and another going down the hill. I was freaking out and crying and I probably said a few swear words, but neither person I hit called the police and they were both really nice. (my dad was more upset than they were.) 4 months later, one of my good friends hit me in the parking lot and my first instinct was to swear at her and yell at her for not paying attention and forgetting to use her brakes. but I remembered that I was in her same situation 4 months earlier, and neither person I hit got angry at me, so I just told her, "you're good. I won't call the police. just use your breaks next time!" and we are still friends. so pretty much, always be kind, even when your friends hits your car.

9. Comparison is the thief of joy. my best friend and I both play piano. we are both really good, but she is better than me and was getting a lot of recognition for her skills, while my choir teacher told me I was "sub-par" and really hurt my feelings. I was really angry for a while, but then I realized that my friend practices 3-4 hours every day at least, and I was using those hours in my day to play tennis instead. also, she doesn't have ADHD and has the ability to sit at the piano without burning out. I can only last 1-2 hours with breaks in between. so I re-evaluated and realized that considering my circumstances, I was doing great. so then I was able to appreciate her talents and abilities without comparing myself to her.

10. Being an individualist has pros and cons, as well as being a groupie. I am a real individualist. I have many good friends, but I don't hang out with the same people every day. I do have a few close friends that I try to eat lunch with more than once a week, but when I go to parties or games, I go in my own car by myself and just meet up with people, rather than go with 3 or 4 friends that I have been hanging out with all day. I like this because I have many different friends, but it can be hard because I don't always get invited to hang out with people. it's not because they don't like me; it's because they mostly hang out with the same people every day and I join in every once in a while. being a groupie can provide more security, but in my mind, it's just not fun being with the same people ALL THE TIME. but to each their own.

11. Acappella tour is fun. Acappella tour is especially fun at Disneyland with your friends who have only gone there once. But if you grew up in So. California like me and have gone over 50 times, maybe don't take your friends on "small world" because they won't appreciate it as much as you do. Also, Becca (middle) and I had to leave Brooke (right) in a random shop on Main Street because she was being too grumpy and wouldn't go on Indiana Jones with us (turns out, she had tonsillitis and wasn't feeling too good). but we did have a good time. my favorite moment was when my friends were making fun of my Smiths t-shirt and my love for weird 80s music, some guy in line for Haunted Mansion turned around and was ALSO WEARING A SMITHS SHIRT! and at the same time, both of us said, "NICE SHIRT!" it was a cool bonding moment.

12. Listen to good music in the morning. as mentioned above, I do love The Smiths. but I can't listen to them in the morning or else I am depressed for the rest of the day. after going through all my music library, I do best when I listen to Queen in the mornings. My family raised me on Queen, and I have nothing but good memories when I listen to them, not to mention Freddie Mercury was probably one of the most talented musicians ever to have lived. "Don't Stop Me Now" is the only song that could possibly pump me up for going to 6-7 hours of school. as a result, I am in a much better mood for the rest of the day, which is really hard for seniors.

13. Don't be a Teacher's Pet, but don't be that kid that administration can't wait to see graduate. no one likes Teacher's Pets except for teachers. you will lose all your friends. some teachers do like a little sass! make them laugh! but don't do it excessively, or else they will hate you and get tired of you. figure out what the right amount is.

14. Please, just don't be that kid who is "so over" everything. you hate high school? you hate everyone? cool. everyone hates you too!

15. Have fun, but don't break the law or do anything that would look bad on college applications. College is tough. So while it is good to have fun in high school, just don't break the law. What is more important, having a good story to tell your kids and going to a not-so-good college, or going to a great college and getting a good job and having a good future while still having a good time?

16. Sparknotes will save your life. But you have to read the book too. I have had to read many books that I didn't choose to read. I didn't understand them, and I didn't like them. So I read the Sparknotes instead, which worked until my teacher made a whole quiz based on quotes from the reading. So, I adopted my new strategy. Read the Sparknotes first, and PRINT THEM OUT FOR REFERENCE when you actually do the reading. they will help clear up anything that doesn't make sense in the book. it's a lot of work, but it will help you understand a lot better than if you had just read Sparknotes, or if you had just read the book.

17. Don't cheat your way through high school. if you didn't do any work to learn anything before the test, and then you have to take it (without anyone's help), then you're screwed. and so is your grade. and so are your college applications!

18. Be honest with your parents. believe me. I've learned not only from experience but also from watching my younger siblings. if you do something bad and they ask you, it's better to be upfront, honest, and apologetic with them and get the smaller punishment, than to lie to them and have them find out later and get the bigger punishment. also, if you are honest with them, they will trust you and give you a later curfew.

19. Be patient. everyone is going through the same thing you are. they are applying to college. some of them are going on missions. some of them are struggling to turn in all their assignments on time. so if anyone gets mad at you for no reason, they are probably just as stressed as you are.

20. Don't focus too much on the future. this is your senior year. HAVE FUN WITH IT! don't be too caught up in getting ready for college and moving out. HAVE FUN! do stuff with your friends. go to games. do everything I mentioned on this list. get good grades. don't skip class. and it's good to prepare for college. but it shouldn't be your life. HAVE A GOOD TIME!

HAWAII part deaux

I've been back from Hawaii for more than a month, I turned 18, I started my last semester of high school, I've been busy trying to convert my friends and family to British '80s alternative (which has been really successful with most people, but in Justin's own words, "Miriam. No one cares about The Smiths anymore except....YOU! and they're probably really stupid just because you listen to them!" someday he will appreciate the classics.) now I am finally getting around to posting the rest of the pics from our trip (while listening to the 1980s Throwback Thursday playlist on Spotify)! this is where a lot of the good stuff starts happening.

DAY 3 (finally!): my dad still had part of his conference in the morning, so mom, the boys, and I hiked Diamond Head. it wasn't a really strenuous hike because most of it was paved, and if a Japanese tourist could hike that thing in platform shoes, then anyone could. it was very windy and on the way back, I lost my hair tie. but it had a gorgeous view.

typical shot with tourists

after the very strenuous hike, we went back to the apartment, the boys watched TV, and Mom and I went shopping. then we had to pick up Dad from the conference, and our next stop was Pearl Harbor! I feel like I was the only one really excited about this because I'm a history enthusiast. my very favorite unit (ok, maybe besides Europe) in AP world history was the World Wars unit. since there are many Japanese tourists in Hawaii as earlier stated, I didn't expect a lot of them to be at Pearl Harbor because....they were the ones who bombed it. but then again, we were the Americans at the Japanese World War II museums in Tokyo. there were more American tourists (including one of Justin's friends), but there were also plenty of our Japanese friends. it was very windy so we weren't able to go on the model of the U.S. Arizona, but we were able to go inside a submarine from WWII! our favorite audio tour guides made a return (a highlight from England and New York ), and it was so interesting to see how they lived and fought. Justin asked why the ship didn't have any windows. I told him it's a submarine, they are underwater and there isn't much to see. when we were finished with the submarine, we exchanged our audio tour guide for another audio tour guide, this time in the submarine museum. by this time, Mom and the boys were getting a bit impatient, but Dad and I wanted to spend as much time as we could learning about submarine warfare. 

 return of the audio tour guides

 listening to their guided tour

 outside the USS Bowfin

 (I edited this so it looks good)

DAY 4: a day full of snorkeling, safety videos, driving, wind, teriyaki burgers, discovering unknown facts about my father, more driving, more safety videos, sea kayaking, getting lost, almost getting shipwrecked, abandoning the group, sitting on the beach, getting sand in places that shouldn't have sand in them, and more! 

nothing will do justice for how awesome Hanama Bay was. we don't have any cool underwater cameras, so you will just have to trust us and believe me when I saw we saw a lot of fish. when I was little, my parents got me a picture book about different kinds of fish, and I recognized at least half of them from that book. it was amazing. if you look at the ocean from the surface, you can't see anything. no one would think there are any fish in there. but when you actually go snorkeling in it, it is like a whole new world. I probably said that in my part 1 post, but holy crap there was SO MUCH MORE FISH here than at Shark's Cove. it got really windy and the currents were getting strong after a little bit, so we only spent like..an hour ish(?) snorkeling, but it was beautiful.

we drove for a bit, stopped at some lookouts, enjoyed the scenery, listened to Crowded House, and then we found a really good teriyaki burger place called Teddy's. all week I'd wanted a juicy, delicious teriyaki burger with pineapple on it, but for some reason, there was nothing in Waikiki that offered anything like that. I was so happy to finally get my burger. most of us ordered the same thing, except my dad ordered some Swiss burger with mushrooms on it. I asked why he didn't get the traditional Hawaiian one, and he said, "I don't like pineapple." well, this was a shock to all of us, especially my mom. she couldn't believe she had been married to him for 21 years but had no idea that he didn't like pineapple. you learn new things every day!

our next phase of our adventure was the sea kayaking phase. we went to some kayak shop in Kailua Bay (which is where Obama likes to visit on holiday), and watched a really long safety video that claimed that it would only take 15-30 minutes to kayak to the island we were trying to reach. Mom and I shared a kayak, Dad and Justin shared another one, and Wesley had one all to himself. some really kind Japanese man launched us from the beach, and we started paddling towards the island. however, the wind was a lot stronger than we expected, and we spent 15 minutes going in circles. well, at least Mom and I did. somehow, the boys were able to fight the strong winds and actually make headway. after a near encounter with seasickness and more spinning around in circles, Mom and I decided to turn around. and in less than one minute, the wind just blew us straight back to shore. at least a half mile from where we were originally launched. Mom and I had our cameras, so the boys weren't able to take any pictures on the island. we were on the beach for about an hour watching kite surfers do tricks and (of course) staring at the ocean! when the boys returned from their island adventure, they made fun of us and said we were sissies and we gave up, but we had such a good time watching kite surfers and it would've taken us an hour to get to that stupid island!

 kite surfers

 shaka

 I peed while this was taken

after getting teased by all the boys, we headed back, just in time to watch the sunset. I'd been in Hawaii for 5 (counting the day we arrived) days, and had never seen a Hawaiian sunset. it was either raining, or we were stuck inside doing something else. but mom and I took a walk to the beach and got some amazing pictures. but even these pictures don't do any justice for how beautiful it is. you have to go there yourself and see it with your own eyes!

DAY 5 (FINALLY): I like to erase the morning part from my brain. basically, my parents were freaking out trying to pack this place up, Justin was singing "Need You Tonight" by INXS nonstop, we lost a key, Wesley wasn't feeling great, and it took forever to find our car. it would be a day full of driving and hiking and eating shrimp and driving and driving and going to the airport. sounds great, right? I love gorgeous scenery, but I don't like getting stuck in a car all day. our hike was gorgeous until it started raining on us. the shrimp was amazing, until the wind came and it started raining. and our last lookout place? that just pretty much sucked, because it was raining on us and we all got muddy. 

 no one wanted to be in this picture

 I didn't want to take this picture

 Justin didn't want to be in this picture (he did have underwear on in this one. he was probably unhappy about being in the car all day instead)

 Laie point

we arrived at the airport sometime in the evening. we had about an hour and a half before our flight came. we were obviously not dressed for Utah weather, so some people (Dad) changed in the parking lot, some changed in the car, and the sensible ones (Mom and I) changed in the airport bathroom and wiped off all the mud we got from hiking in the rain. this flight was one of the most depressing flights I'd ever been on. first of all, it was a red-eye and the AC was on full power all night. second of all, Mom wasn't being very courteous and wanted to read a book, so all the lights were off except for her seat, and this wasn't a nice subtle light. this light would blink on and off every 5 seconds. but the worst was the seat quality. I've been on several long flights, many longer than this one. I've endured through many discomforts, but these seats were literally filled with rocks. I did sleep for maybe 2 hours (a new record for an airplane!), but I woke up with the worst numb bum I'd ever experienced. my back hurt, my neck hurt, and I was really sad that I was actually on my way back to Salt Lake and I wouldn't be in paradise anymore. getting off that plane was a relief, but it was very depressing. as soon as we walked outside to the shuttle, it was snowing. all I had on was a light jacket, yoga pants, and Converse. not the warmest option. our van was buried in snow, and we had to just stand outside and freeze while Dad scraped the snow off. (what a saint. also the only one to have gloves with him.) we were all so jet lagged, we slept the entire drive back to Provo. it took a while to get used to the crappy weather, and I still want to go back. I always will. as much as I loved England and New York and all the other places I've been, I have never been so sad to leave a vacation. the weather was perfect, the scenery was gorgeous, and I was able to get a tan. it was the best way to ever spend winter vacation, and I better save my money because I don't know if I can handle another Christmas break in Provo after this!