I know that because people hate negativity, girls like to sound like "it isn't too bad" or "there's always next year". I am horrible at hiding my feelings, so I usually just say it how it is. and at first, it really sucked. I mean, really. showing up to practice later than everyone else because they had ALL of 7th PERIOD to practice was bad. doing the C-team drills weren't my favorite. and I would have to remind myself that I was here because I love tennis, and I want to move up, and that if I didn't go to practice, Coach would probably move me down even more. I would go to practice and try to have a good time, and most of the time, I usually ended up having a good time.
well, Monday, we had our first match of the season! (ok, maybe it was pre-season. but our first match against another team.) we played at Orem High School. Now, I can't bash on Orem because a lot of Timpview is friends with Orem. That's what I think makes them great rivals, because a lot of the girls already know each other. I know Timpview won state last year, but Orem has a lot of really good players who, like a lot of the Timpview team, have been trained since age 8. but I somehow got it in my head that since I was a JV alternate, the person I would get matched up with wouldn't be very good.
our varsity team was.....not doing their best. everyone lost. our JV team didn't have great luck, either. I was waiting anxiously to play, and finally, I was the last match of the day.
the girl they had me play against wore me out in the warm up.
which, in a match, that would be good. but not the warm up. she said she already played a match today, so I was the second person she was playing. she hit me really tricky shots and had me running around everywhere, which is seriously a great skill. but again, in the warm up, it's a warm up. not a "wear the opponent out before the match even begins."
then she said, "I usually play varsity doubles or JV singles."
why. why. WHY. WHY. I'm not even an official JV player, and they put me against a Varsity girl. what the heck were these coaches trying to do to me? kick me off the team for good?
my whole team was watching and trying to cheer me on whenever I did something well. but.... I didn't really do anything that well. I ran for every shot, but I would either hit it out, or into the net. this made me even more frustrated. when I was losing, 0-5, my coach pulled me out for a pep talk and told me to relax. so, I did, and I aced her on my serve. I was able to win that next game, even though it was close. the rest of the games went to deuce. I played okay, but still, not my best. I was able to win 1 more game, and she won the rest. so, I lost, 2-8. I congratulated her on playing well, because really, she did.
most of my team saw how I did, and they all felt bad. a lot of them even said, "you didn't play the way you normally do, but she's a tough opponent, and you were able to get it together in the end." now, I shouldn't have beat myself up for losing to a varsity person. but when the people who weren't watching asked how I did, I did the embarrassing thing and started to cry. most of the team didn't know what to say, which was good. I didn't cry because I lost, but mostly because I didn't play well at all. I normally have really good form. and if I hit with correct form, it almost always goes in. but I lost my form completely, and forgot everything my coaches have ever taught me. I am not the best at accepting defeat, but if I lose and I know I played well, it just doesn't feel as bad, because at least I played well. the other person just played better. but when I lose and I don't play well, it just feels a lot worse. and I know failure is the opportunity for improvement. and I knew what i needed to improve. but I was not in the mood to hear motivational speeches.
Coach didn't even need to ask how I felt about the way I played.
after a good, long cry session with my best friend on the team, I decided to get over it. I had another match on Wednesday, and I couldn't self-destruct again. I had relaxed more, and the first match is always the hardest. hopefully, our team would play better. When we got to Timpanogos High School in Orem, we were relieved to find that they had 2 more courts than Orem did. I was also not so stressed out, and I had more confidence. the matches were going a lot quicker too, because of the extra courts. after.....45 minutes, Coach told me they were ready for me to play.
the girl I played was a sophomore. I tried not to wear her out in the warm up. we had a really nice warm up, actually. all my serves were going in. when the match started, it was a lot different than when I played Orem 2 days ago. she served first, and I was able to break her serve on the first game. not to brag or anything, but that is kind of a big deal. When I serve, I play better, and the same goes for other players (unless they double fault every serve). I find it a lot more frustrating when the opponent breaks my serve, than when they are serving and I lose. I won the first game, we traded sides, and the next game was my serve. I'll save all of you and not describe the match game by game, but early on, I was able to figure out where her weak spots were, and use those to my advantage. I would serve harder, and I would always return to where she would have to run for it. as the match went on, she would get more and more frustrated. we did have some really long rallies, she did hit some really good passing shots, and we did go into a few deuces, but in the end, I won.
8-0.
in tennis slang, we call that a "bagel".
I don't even know how I did that. I went from 2-8 to 8-0 in just 2 days. and the fact that I played really well was even more rewarding. and let's not forget that I'm not an official JV singles player.
varsity won, and our school only had 2 losses. that day was a really good day. to say we turned it around from Monday is an understatement.
Coach was really proud of me, and told me that I had improved a lot and I have been working really hard, and that I would be playing a lot more than I thought I would. so pretty much, I will play in more matches than I won't play in! and now, practices are not as "segregated" by team. on Friday, it was divided into Singles and Doubles. not Singles, Doubles, and C-team. I was actually the only C-team girl to join the singles practice, but no one even cared or treated me like I was below them. it was one of the best practices I ever had. today, it was half conditioning, and half rotating drills. another of the best practices, even though I hate conditioning. so I guess I don't even feel like a reject anymore. I am finally starting to feel like part of the team. I was able to prove that even though I didn't get the spot I wanted, I can still win. I am still a good player. and the fact that all those girls above me are also winning just means that we have a really good team. and that love for tennis is coming back. (not that I ever lost it, but for a while, it seemed that way.)
and some pictures.
me and my best friend on the team, Grace. this was at Orem. I did not order a uniform skirt, so I didn't match the rest of the team. but our colors are blue and orange, so what I did wasn't too bad. also I kinda think my skirt is cuter. (it's actually my mom's, but she agreed to lend it to me for tennis season because it's Timpview colors.) but anyways, I just love this girl so much. I love driving her home from practice and going to lunch and talking and laughing and singing and crying together. and even though she's 2nd Varsity Doubles and I'm Unofficial JV Singles, I love to play with her.
after I won 8-0 against Timpanogos. I actually wore my blue skirt to match the rest of the teams. it looks exactly the same as all the other uniform skirts, so that's why I didn't order one. I still think the orange one looks better.
Sophie, one of my favorite new freshmen. we did not plan our outfits! we just showed up and were practically matching! (also the only day I decide not to wear a skirt.) so, of course we take a picture. also, I got 4 inches chopped off my hair that day, and I was a bit sad about that. that's an understatement. I actually cried. I still don't like it, but it's healthier and easier to care for.
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