2013 for the Castle family in a nutshell

we never get family pictures taken. whenever we send out Christmas cards, we always use a photo taken of us on vacation. none of us are color coordinated, and I'm a bit OCD about that. this year, all we did was go to Moab and Bear Lake, and there isn't a single picture of all of us with our clothes on, and we needed to update our family picture on the wall anyway (which was from 2008), so we finally gave in and decided to get our pictures taken. I love how they turned out! Mom and I decided on everyone's outfit, and Wes finally had an excuse to wear his "cool, new, stylish skinny jeans".

so my mom wrote the Christmas letter this year, and since this is my blog, I am going to switch things around just a bit, because this is me typing, not my mom.

let's start with me. I got my braces off, so this picture seems ancient. I turn 16 in less than a month, and according to my mom, I am "excited to date boys and drive cars." yep. This year was all about tennis. I spent the entire summer training for the Timpview Tennis Team; I had a private coach, I played with my mom, and I joined a city league and participated in several matches and tournaments. At the end of the summer, I made JV singles and had the best time playing! I really miss it and am currently doing cross training and playing on the indoor courts as much as I can. I also continue to play piano and practice around 1 hour everyday, and I'm getting really good, if I say so myself. I was the Sophomore Homecoming Princess this year. and my mom says I'm growing up too fast. what.

Wesley is also growing up too fast, according to my mother. I kind of agree with her. He is now 13 and in 7th grade, but attends junior high at Provo High School, where there is a gifted program. He was a jungle animal in the school production of Seussical: the Musical. He loved everything about it: acting, singing, dancing, hanging out with high schoolers and going to IHOP at midnight for cast parties and ordering steak. He is learning the hard lessons I learned in 7th grade: turning in all the assignments, on time. As soon as the play ended, ski season began and he is going skiing up at Sundance every chance he gets. He's a funny kid, and he is usually great to have around, except that he eats everything in the house. Oh, and he is now taller than I am. 

Justin. my mom will straight up say that he is the favorite child. He is all about sports. He and his friends got invited to a special soccer team, and they practiced really hard over the summer and learned a lot more about soccer and playing as a team. When he wasn't scoring goals for his team, he was the goalie and wouldn't let the other team score on him. His team ended up winning the championship! Right after soccer ended, J tried out for bantam basketball, and ended up getting the same coach he had for soccer. His team practices everyday at 6:30 AM, and he loves working hard and learning about basketball. He is following in his sister's footsteps and is getting quite accomplished on the piano. And he is the cutest thing, and everyone loves him.

Mom decided to take Japanese this year at BYU, and it turned out to be very difficult so she used Dad to help her study. Now, Dad is already very busy teaching chemistry at BYU, and in addition to grading papers and doing whatever professors do, he is also booked with teaching me how to drive and helping the kiddos with homework. This year, he had to help his wife memorize Japanese. When the class ended a week ago, everyone was relieved, but I think Dad was more relieved than Mom. In Mom's free time, she runs with her friends, attempts to grow vegetable gardens, drives the boys around to their many activities, and plays tennis with me.

it's been a great year, and I hope you enjoyed reading this. Merry Christmas to all of you!

contemplation

lately, I've been thinking a lot about.... life.

in high school, teachers stress about getting good test scores so we can get the best grade we can and so we can get into a good school. they want to work us until we pretty much die.

I have attention deficit disorder. and I am in 4 honors classes. all which come with heaps of homework. this mentally and physically exhausts me, to try to pay attention every second of the lesson. it gets to the point where it's too much work for me, my brain can't function anymore, I go into freak out mode, and I just zone out. I'm not good at getting my homework done, either. I have so much of it, but there are so many things in life that I would rather enjoy. such as developing friendships, making cookies, playing tennis, playing piano (not practicing. just sitting and playing for my own enjoyment), shopping, going on drives...... but if I don't get all my homework done, there goes my future.

one thing I hate more than anything else is how the school counselors show up in our classrooms and make us fill out these career pathway forms and take little quizzes to get us started on thinking about our careers. but I'm only a sophomore in high school. I don't turn 16 for 57 more days. I can't think about my career yet. all I'm trying to do is get through my sophomore year. because I can't handle the stress of overthinking about my future. but the counselors get frustrated when I don't answer their questions. so, I've been thinking about it occasionally. all I know is that I want to go to BYU, and get a degree in something, and get married and have kids. but I feel like I have to get everything figured out because the counselors keep bringing it up.

I'm just a teenage girl trying to survive high school. I want to get good grades. I want to do well in tennis and piano and everything else. I am learning how to drive without hitting the curb when I back out of my driveway so I can get my license in 2 months. but my parents, wanting me to be tough and work for things, won't buy me a car unless I pay for it myself. I struggle to pay my monthly phone bill, so I can't even think about a car. I know that I have a lot of friends, both girls and boys. but I always feel like I'm the second choice friend. I like to appear cheerful and happy, and I truly enjoy making others happy. but sometimes, I have bad days. sometimes, things just get hard. and I'm unhappy. I cannot leave the house without doing my hair, putting on makeup, and color coordinating my outfits. this does not mean that I am insecure or think I'm ugly. I just feel the need to get myself ready because then I look better, and if I look better, then I feel better. truthfully, I feel lazy when I wear sweats and don't put on makeup. I look like I don't care about anything. at least if I look put together, then I feel like my life is put together. so please, don't tell a girl not to waste her time putting on makeup. because it just enhances things and makes us look better, it does not mean we are insecure or are hiding who we are!

so I've already mentioned this twice, but i'm almost 16. you know what this means. in the Mormon culture, dating isn't acceptable until the age of 16. but a lot of my friends (and I'm not saying they are bad people or anything) have already kissed at least 5 guys, some more than 10. they have had a few "relationships" that have lasted for less than 3 months. but they don't call this "dating." they call this "going out". they don't go to dances until they are 16 to live up to this rule.
let's take a look at me. most of my friends have already had their first kiss before they were 16. I haven't kissed anyone yet, because I made it a goal to wait until 16. but even after that, I don't want to kiss someone just to say "I've had my first kiss." I want to wait for the right moment, at the right time. but sometimes, I feel pressured to make the wrong choice, just to fit in with my friend group. I've never been in a relationship with anyone. I am really good friends with a lot of boys, and I find some of them very attractive. and I admit to really liking a few of them (never all at once), but I just don't feel the need to get in a relationship. I have watched it happen: a boy and a girl start out as friends, then they start liking each other, then they start going out, then they become a "thing." then, things get messed up and they aren't allowed to hang out with other people, drama arises, and one of them decides that they just don't want to go out anymore, they break up, and then neither of them talk to each other. they aren't even friends. it makes me sad. I just couldn't stand the idea of becoming really close with a boy, then going out with him, breaking up, and never talking again. I'm too scared of that happening. and it's a lot of commitment. I'm in high school. I want to enjoy life and not have to commit myself to one person all the time. I'm just not ready for that. I enjoy being friends with lots of boys, and having a few really close ones. it's a lot less drama that way, and I don't like drama.
now, don't get me wrong. I do want to go on dates. I want to eat food and go to movies and do fun things and have good times. but I just don't want a boyfriend. at least not yet. maybe I'll change my mind when I'm older. but it's just sad, watching lots of young girls get heartbroken over a boy. it may seem as if your life is in decline, and you will never see sunshine again. but really, that's a lot of commitment to make and it's just not worth it while you are supposed to be enjoying your life in high school.

and not getting too stressed about grades either. or the future.

it's a lot easier not worrying about things. not looking at the big picture. getting by, one assignment at a time instead of thinking about the huge final you have to take at the end of the year.

life is meant to be enjoyed. it's good to push yourself, but not to the point of stressing yourself out so much it ends up controlling your life and you go insane. do your best, and never stress.

try not to get too attached to one person. because that just messes everything up in the long run.

focus more on friendships with many people. you can have a few closer friends, and a best friend. that's good too. but it's good to get to know people.

be confident with yourself, and help others feel good about themselves too.

try not to please everyone, because it's impossible.

make someone's day, every day.

failure is an opportunity for improvement. it can be heartbreaking, but it's all just a big learning experience.

good music and tennis can fix everything.

good times.

the blogging game.

more than 3 years ago, when I first discovered blogging, I intended to use it as sort of a journal. I would blog about pretty much everything that was going on in my life: school, my friends, family vacations, personal thoughts, everything. and it was a lot more convenient than keeping a written journal. I found those things pointless. I mean, who the heck would sit down everyday and write
"today was a good day. the sun was shining. I went to school. I saw my friends. my classes were hard. I went to tennis. Tennis was fun. Then I did homework and practiced piano and ate dinner and talked to my family. It was a good day."
that just isn't in my nature. so, if I needed to share my feelings, I would go directly to the blog. eventually in 8th grade, I got a notebook that I specifically labeled "interactions with cute boys." because of course, who would blog about that? too awkward. but I still preferred blogging overall. this was especially useful when we were in Japan, because it was a fun and exciting way to document my experience.

then in my freshman year, I became very busy with homework and other things. there wasn't really anything exciting to blog about. but I still wanted some way to record my feelings that are too personal to blog about. so I found a notebook, decorated it, and wrote on the first page

"Miriam Elaina Castle- age 15, Freshman at Timpview High School. Journal Started: February 3, 2013.

I've been keeping journals since like the end of October in 8th Grade. I used to detest them. But I started to really like boys and I felt like I needed a personal place to write down my feelings about them, that no one could read except me..."  so then the journal entry goes on to describe a boy who had recently tickled my fancy. that was only the start. and yes, I did primarily write about that kind of stuff, going into great detail writing exact conversations, describing appearances, and things I liked about them. but pretty soon, it turned into exactly what I wrote on the inside page of the journal I am currently writing in.

"Miriam Elaina Castle- age 15, Sophomore at Timpview High School. Journal started September 1, 2013. (sound familiar?)

• for thoughts that I wish not to share with the world, but are too beautiful to stay inside my head, so they are to be written on paper and not for anyone else to read.
• for those times I need to reminisce.
• for those good, great, amazing experiences I wish to keep with me forever.
• for those teeny little details I wish not to forget.
• for the smallest things that make my days
• for those innermost feelings I need to get out of my system. 
• for long ramblings that make no sense.

so, because I have recently found a liking for journal writing, I have neglected blogging, in a way. sure, I would post in the summer, when we would go on vacations or about tennis tournaments. but hardly ever would I post my reflections of the meaning of life anymore. I had a new place for that. lately I haven't been doing very well at this blogging game. it is really time-consuming, and I hardly have any spare time now that I've gotten older. It just isn't the first on my priority list anymore. but because I assume people still read this thing, I will continue playing the blogging game. just not as frequently as I used to, and probably just the same old "what I am doing in my life" posts with pictures to go along with them, because I would love to keep you all updated about how I am doing. but yes, I have finally figured out how to write a journal, and make it fun, in a way. and when I am bored and have nothing to do (usually late at night), I find myself looking back on old journal entries, reminiscing on those good times. and it makes me very happy.

I feel like this post was totally pointless. I just wanted you all to know that I still exist, and I still blog. even though I have found a new passion for journals.

cliché fall pictures.

 

 

 

 

so there is this trend on Instagram which I absolutely love but kinda hate at the same time:

cliche fall pictures.

I love fall. It is my favorite season. it could very possibly beat summer. I love them both for different reasons, but fall. my favorite colors are red and orange, and when the leaves change colors, I find it absolutely gorgeous. fall in Utah is the most beautiful time of the year. to everyone who complains about living in Provo, I can sympathize with you because the winters here are not exactly delightful. (unless you are a skiing fanatic like my brothers.) but really guys, I think that living this close to the mountains makes up for the bitter cold. it's my favorite time of year, when the trees on the mountains start changing. The tennis courts I practice at (not with the team) are in Sherwood Hills, my absolute favorite neighborhood of Provo. it is on the hill above Timpview, and the houses are all very nice, you are as close to the mountains as you can get while still staying in the city, and you have a breathtaking view of the whole city below. I frequently drive around this area because my grandma lives close to it, a lot of my friends live up there, my tennis courts are there, and I just love the view. when I play tennis, the court faces the mountains, and I just love all the different colors on the trees. we are blessed to live in such a beautiful place.

so, every fall, every girl in Provo gets the same idea: let's go up to Provo Canyon and take pictures! so they gather up all their friends and do a photoshoot of them in their new fall outfits, usually oversized sweaters and leather boots, and they take pictures together, all smiles. and then, as soon as they get home, they all post their pictures with some caption as simple as "I love fall!" with some leaf emojis. everyday, my news feed is filled with these cliche fall pictures. and I can't complain, but there is just so many of them. and a few days after the first picture from the photoshoot is posted, the girl decides it is "too old", and posts another from the photoshoot.

I admit, I am guilty. we all know I love fall, and it is just so pretty, why wouldn't I do a photoshoot? I didn't go up to the canyon, but I found a nice little place to get my pictures done. my lovely friend Bailey from digital photo took several amazing photos on a real camera (not an iPhone like most of these cliche fall photos are taken on; and I have nothing against that. I actually do that myself), and these ones I have posted aren't even 1/4 of the ones we took. these are just my absolute favorites. and our friend Libby from tennis also came along and helped me with my poses and fixed my hair. and they all turned out amazing. so yes, of course, i get home, wait for Bailey to send me the pictures, and I finally cracked and got on Instagram and posted a cliche fall photo. I did one. yes, I did. and you know what? I don't care. because like many other girls in Provo, I love fall. and I love taking pictures. so really, I shouldn't complain.

on a side note: our varsity tennis team won STATE CHAMPS!!!!!!!!! for the first time in 12 years. we won state. I can't believe it, but at the same time, I am not surprised at all. we have some really amazing girls on our team, and Kate Cusick, our 1st singles player who happens to be in my grade, won the entire thing herself. not only did our team win state, but Kate won individual as well. even though I didn't play, I am just so so so so so happy. Our tennis season has been the best tennis season I've had (the only tennis season I've had with Timpview), and I have had so many good times. We had a banquet on Tuesday that was about 2 1/2 hours long. and each girl has done amazing this season, and I love every one of them.

 Emmaline, me, and Gabby. I only wish I was tall.

Megan, my cute doubles partner at Region. I just love this girl so much. for fall break, she went to Hawaii and got us matching bracelets. she is the sweetest, and she just loves to play tennis and is always happy to be at practices, and I just love that. she just always makes my days. and yes, I am older. I'm almost 16, and she's 14. and there isn't any hope for me. I haven't grown since I was 13.

well folks, I gotta do some end of term homework. wish me luck. have a great day, and I have just been so so so so so so happy. life is good. so good. so good.

tennis REGION tournament

1. it seriously can't be October already. October is my favorite month, but really. this year's gone by wayyyyy too fast.
2. it is getting colder and I think we skipped this nice fall weather we are supposed to have because it's been raining and snowing ever since October came around. except today I did play some tennis with my mom and it was actually not cold.
3. I got my braces off. I don't really have any "before" pictures with my braces. mostly because they were bad. and most of the friends I have now, I met either in 8th grade or my freshman year, so they wouldn't even know what I looked like before the braces came. but after our relationship of 2 1/2 years, we finally broke up and they're gone.

4. Not too long after the braces came off, Wesley turned 13. What the heck. We have 2 teenagers in the house now. Wes is enjoying junior high. he isn't going to Centennial like I did or like Justin will in 2 years. Instead, he is doing a gifted and talented program at Provo High School with other gifted kiddos and they take advanced classes that aren't even available at Centennial. Personally, I would die, being at Provo High School (Timpview's biggest rival) with high schoolers and a bad football team and no friends and only gifted kids and high school homework and riding the bus everyday. but Wes is having a great time, because all his friends go there that he knew at CAS, the gifted and talented elementary school he attended. He likes his classes and is the only 7th grader in the high school play! they are doing Seussical, which is what I did at Centennial! he is a jungle animal and he is having lots of fun with it. he is also learning French Horn with the band and it sounds like a dying elephant.

picture from the summer. I still had my braces on. obviously. this kiddo keeps getting taller.

5. tennis season ended. I have a lot more time for homework and things. but am I happy that it's done? I don't think I am. (told you this post would lead up to tennis.)

I had a bit of a rough start to the season. I started out tryouts well, but it got more difficult along the way. the first 2 matches I played were doubles matches, and I was able to win one of them. that gave me some confidence for the rest of the season. I was doing really well at practice, but then I pulled a muscle in my right wrist, and I had to take some time off practice so it wouldn't get worse. then, I came back and I started to improve. I was actually doing really well. but I wasn't exactly winning my matches. in fact, I hadn't won any of my singles matches, even though I played really well. What usually happened was that my opponent and I would both kind of take turns winning and losing, but at the end, they were the harder fighter. it didn't bother me too much at first, because I knew I was doing everything right. all my serves were going in, I hit hard, I had topspin, my backhand soon became better than my forehand. but there was just one thing that I couldn't do right: winning. none of my losses were really bad. most of the time, I lost by 6-8 which is the closest you can get without having to go into a tiebreaker. but even though I knew that I was doing really well, I wanted to win. I was sick of losing all the time. 

at one of my home matches, I was having a horrible day. I had just lost to Springville the day before (again, it was 6-8, and one of the best matches I ever played), my classes were getting harder, both girl and boy drama was going on, and my very best friend and I weren't speaking with each other. some of my really good friends had tried to cheer me up, and I was happy for the time being, but that didn't last long. I didn't come with the mindset to play tennis, and there was a lot going on earlier that day and some of my teammates asked me what was wrong, and me being a total girl, just lost it, fell apart, and started crying in front of most of the team. the girls were all being really nice to me and encouraged me, telling me that I would do great in my match. I tried to think positive. I started off the match really well, but in the end, I was demolished. by a freshman. I don't even want to say the score. but I got really frustrated and nearly broke my racket. after that bad match, I knew I needed to get my act together and shape it up for regionals. 

but guess what. a lot more girls wanted to play singles, so all the JV singles players did challenge matches. I didn't win enough of them to get me a spot in singles. which means the one word I hate: doubles. I would finish out the tennis season that I had worked really hard at, playing doubles. not singles. and was I happy about this? you figure that out for yourself. my doubles partner and I had warmed up together, and played against each other, and I won every time. but we had never really had the chance to work together as a team. and I wanted to practice doing that with her, but our schedules just didn't work out that way. so was I terrified for regionals? OF COURSE I WAS. I, previously 3rd JV Singles who was much better than my record showed, a very inexperienced doubles player, would be playing doubles for the most important tournament of the season. what some people don't understand is that singles is very different than doubles. depending on the player, it can be harder or easier. for me, I like having the whole court to myself and not having to depend on someone else to hit shots on the other side of the court. there's a lot more shots you can take, and it's easier to score a point because you only have 1 opponent. dubs players disagree and say it's harder to cover the entire court yourself, and it's nicer to have a partner that can get to the shots that you can't. but for me, I can't just a passing cross-court shot and win the point, because there would be another player at that spot. I can't put it away at the net either, because there's a net player. and it's a lot more devastating to lose, because part of it isn't even your fault. you have a partner. That is a big change to adjust to, and I just didn't have enough time. but my partner, Megan, has been playing doubles for most of the season, and it suits her better than singles. so she was much more experienced at doubles than I was, and more comfortable. so that made me feel a little bit better. and her personality is just a lot more easygoing and relaxed, so when she loses, it's no big deal for her. she just accepts it, and life goes on. for me, I can only accept defeat if I feel like I played my best. if I didn't play my best, it's harder to accept. 

On Thursday, it was raining. and Megan and I played our first doubles match together as a team. it was clear that our opponents had experience as a partnership. Megan and I did not. Both of us weren't going for shots because we thought the other person would. it wasn't because we were bad players; it was because we just hadn't worked together before. but I was really frustrated, and as the game went on, I lost my form and hit it out, and I double faulted my serve (which rarely happens). finally, we had lost, 3-8. so I try to hide the fact that I could smash 10 rackets, shake my opponents hands, and tell them how well they did. Then, I just walk off, and try not to cry in front of my partner. as soon as I find my mom, I just start crying. not because I was mad at my partner. but because I was mad at myself. Like I said, losing doubles is a lot more devastating than losing singles. I had about an hour between my next match, so that gave me time to calm down. I talked with my mom and my other teammates, and I felt better. soon enough, Megan and I walked back on the tennis courts, this time with a lot more confidence.

I had played both the girls on the opposing team in singles matches with the city league over the summer, and had beaten one of them. with the experience of playing them before, I knew what their strengths and weaknesses were. and both Megan and I were doing 100 times better than we did in the first match. like Meg said, we just hadn't had the experience together, and it would be better the second time. both of us were going for more shots, and we kept our form and hit less into the net. the other girls would get frustrated, and hit the ball into the net. as a singles player, I didn't have to go into the net very often. but in this match, I was constantly at the net, smashing the ball at their feet. (so was Meg when it was her turn up at the net.) my backhand slices were coming back. I never double faulted. we still lost, but were we upset at all? NO. both of us had played our very best, and we made our comebacks. I had never been so proud of myself or my partner this entire season. that was the best we had ever played. so what if we lost? to me, as I said earlier, it matters more if I play well, than the final score. 

that was our last match of the Timpview Girls JV Tennis Season. Varsity won their region tournament, and will be playing in state this week. part of me wishes that I was there too, but who cares. the last match was amazing. I have become a much better player than I was at the beginning of the summer. I am not even the same person. even though I'm not exactly proud of my individual record, I know that I played my best, and I played really well. I have made soooooo many friends with all the girls on the team, and I am so glad to have such a good relationship with them. they are all very nice, and I would always look forward to practices and matches and working with them. I am so sad the season is over! I don't know what I will do for the rest of the year! Nothing to look forward to after school! But I will continue practicing every day with my mom or find some friends that will play with me. I already can't wait for next season. I want it to be as good, if not better, as this season!

 in between matches at Springville. Gabby (top right hand corner) looks like an alien. and the way I am looking at Emmaline just isn't okay.

 None of us look good here. BACK ROW: Vanessa, Libby, Annie, and Gabby. FRONT ROW: Lauren, Emmaline, and me.

 Emmaline wanted to send a group snapchat to everyone. (probably becasue she's the only one who looks good in it.) 2 seconds later, Annie's granola bar fell out of her mouth and into my hair. very nice of her. and the Mmeerrmiiee came from Merm, which came from my Jackson who is my favorite person, and until tennis, he was the only one who called me that. but I guess the nickname spread to the whole tennis team, and everyone calls me that. and I love it.

 Megan and me after our second match at regionals! believe it  or not, she's the freshman and I'm the sophomore. we did really well!

 and what is a tennis match without awkward racket poses?

Nothing can explain my love for tennis. even though "love" means "zero" in tennis. I just love tennis, ok? It is a major part of my life that I don't know what I would do without. 

Castles are royalty.

last friday was the most amazing day of my life. I, Miriam Elaina Castle, was Sophomore Homecoming Princess at Timpview High School. coincidence?

I hadn't ever really thought about the possibility of this happening, until....it happened. one of my really good friends, Jackson, had been sophomore royalty the previous year. I had only heard about it, because I was still in Japan at that time. I didn't know how it worked, how you got chosen, if you needed any qualifications, if you needed to go on a date with the person you were royalty with. and most of all, I didn't think it would be me. but a week before homecoming, one of my friends tweeted "Miriam Castle for Homecoming Royalty 2013." so then I kinda got really excited and wondered if enough people would see it and vote for me. after a while, the tweet had been retweeted several times, and some other people were tweeting similar things, just a different boy every time. that day, a lot of people said, "hey I voted you for Sophomore Homecoming Royalty, I hope you win!" I was really happy, but I was still confused of how it worked. finally, someone explained that you get a piece of paper in English class, and you would write 4 names: a boy and a girl for your grade, and a senior boy and girl for Homecoming King and Queen. if enough people all agreed to put my name in, I had a chance of winning. but I tried to prepare myself for not winning, because there's at least 300 different sophomore girls at Timpview, and only 1 could win.

on the Tuesday of that week, I had to get checked out of seminary to go get my braces tightened, and on my way out, my friend Gabby, a senior on the tennis team who's also on Student Government, told me that I won Sophomore Homecoming Royalty! I hate to admit it. I wasn't surprised at all. but what did surprise me was that I won by a lot, and that no one else really had a chance! I was so grateful to my friends for getting the word out fast, to vote for me! she explained that I would appear in the homecoming assembly on the day of the game, and I would ride out on a moped with my prince at halftime at the game that evening. I couldn't believe that it would actually happen to me. I wasn't surprised that I won, I was just surprised that so many people thought of me. I'm 5'0'', and while short girls are cute, tall girls are beautiful. I would expect someone taller to win. but I was so excited, and while I was instructed to keep it a secret, I told my mom, who told my grandma, and no one on my mom's side of the family can keep a secret! and I told Jackson because he was the same thing last year, and he was probably more excited for me than I was. that really helped, knowing that he was happy too! I wasn't as nervous as I would've been if I hadn't told anyone! but the problem was, after I told Jackson, I thought, "well, I want Brooke to know, too! and Madi! and Raquel! and Haley!" so then all my girlfriends knew by the next day. but did I care? NOPE! as exciting as being surprised may sound, I'd rather have people support me and share the excitement!

Friday was the Big Day. I had to wake up at 5:30 to get my hair done, because of dumb drivers ed at 6:30. my poor mother had a migraine and didn't want to wake up. but she was so nice and did my hair and took me to school and told me that she would sleep until I needed her to come bring me my dress for the assembly. she really wanted to see me, even with a bad headache. I guess it's kinda a big deal, if your daughter is Sophomore Homecoming Princess!

the assembly was one of the best parts of my big day. not everyone would come to the football game (which is pretty pathetic because who doesn't love football?), but everyone would be at the assembly. Josh Lillywhite, my prince, sat next to me while we watched dancing football players and the Drill Team and Dance Company and Cheerleaders and all that stuff. we were both excited to walk on, I think. I don't know. he seemed pretty excited! before we went on, he would practice escorting me and giving me my flower, and how we would look. when it was time, the freshmen walked on first. that was amazing. the freshman prince was Kollin Galland, who is one of my really good friends. 2 weeks before, he was doing a double backflip on a trampoline, landed on his head, and broke his neck. He is still in the ICU at Primary Childrens, and it has been hard on everyone. the day I found out, I couldn't stop crying, and to make me feel better, I took Wes to the temple with me to do baptisms for the dead and we both prayed for Kollin. I felt so peaceful and I had a feeling that he would be okay, even if it would be a long recovery. our whole family fasted for him, and every night, Justin reminds us to pray for him. that makes me so happy. but Kollin was chosen as prince, and his brother Ethan, who is in my grade, walked on for him. this is what I love about going to Timpview. When people are going through hard times, the whole school gets involved and every student is very supportive. we all come together to do whatever we can to support anyone who is affected. after Kollin's accident, we all wore blue and signs were hung all around the school, reminding us to pray for him. I am so proud to be a Timpview Thunderbird! I love how everyone wanted to support Kollin and honor him! his mom has a blog for him, prayforkollin.blogspot.com and I tear up everytime I read it. Ethan escorted the lovely Nicole Curtis, one of my favorite freshmen girls! we played tennis together once, and she is one of the nicest girls I know.

After Kollin was honored, it was time. Josh and I linked arms, and walked across the gym for the whole school to see. as soon as we emerged from the "secret lair", everyone cheered. and I was just overwhelmed with happiness. Josh handed me his flower, and the audience went nuts. people were cheering our names, and that just made me even happier. junior and senior royalty walked on, and after that, the assembly ended. Everyone walked up to us and congratulated us and told us how good we looked and how well we did.

by the time the assembly ended, my curls had straightened out. problems of having really thick hair. I didn't really care, I would just redo it before the game. throughout that day, I got so many compliments: my dress, my hair, my prince, everything. but the ones that really made my day were "You just looked like the happiest girl alive!" and "not only did you look gorgeous, you were smiling, and that just made you look even more beautiful!" if this was only the assembly, I couldn't wait for what the game would bring.

I went home and took a nice long nap before I had to get ready again. My whole family except Wes, who decided that his scout campout was more important than supporting his sister, went to the game. the plan was to watch the beginning with my friends, find Student Government during second quarter, and make the entrance during half time. the lowerclassmen would all enter on mopeds, and the seniors would drive cars. Josh was pretty excited about driving a scooter, and he took it on at least 5 different test drives before he took one with me. I was a bit nervous about falling off, but he didn't go too fast or intentionally try to throw me off, so it all went very smoothly. everyone congratulated us, including people I have never met in my life! it was amazing.

 the prince and the princess. 

after half time, I got a million more congratulations, found my friends, and watched the rest of the game. Timpview won, 40-7! that just added to the greatness of the night!

so as you can tell, I loved every minute of it. and I'm so glad I got it my sophomore year, the year that I wasn't quite old enough to date, but I could still participate in the whole thing without going to the dance. It was honestly the best day ever.

i guess i'm a sophomore. yeeeh.

well, I made it. I'm a sophomore. it's pretty crazy isn't it. I remember, my first day of school as a freshman. Everyone else had already been in school for 6 weeks. but because I was on top of Mt. Fuji the day that school started, I had to start 6 weeks later than everyone else. I was a bit confused at first, but soon I got into the swing of things. but I was kind of scared of the older kids. some of the sophomores I already knew from when I was in Junior High. I had a lot of classes with older kids, so I did make friends quickly. one of my best friends that year was a sophomore (and we still are best friends). but he just seemed so much.... older to me. much like the rest of them. they were all 16, most of which could drive, many which even had their own cars, and there was the whole dating thing. I tried to remind myself that most of these kids are just a year older than me. but it hit me. I was in high school. that would be me in a year. I'd still be a lower classman. but as a young freshman, I still couldn't believe it. and there were juniors too. and seniors. I would talk to a few juniors and even a few seniors. but they just......well....... were a lot older than me, it seemed. I was one of the shortest ones. I thought I had it hard. which, I did. a lot of my classes were hard. and older kids would tell me, "it only gets worse every year." thanks for making me excited about high school, people. but I had a pretty good year. much better than all of junior high combined.

Malia, Lynley, Madi, Abby, me, Gillian, Brooke, and Callie

yes. these are all my adorable sophomore friends. we are all the same age. even me. and yes, I really am that short. this isn't photoshopped. people were asking me if I was a freshman. but I love this picture. Abby is one of my really good friends from Orem, and she surprised us all by enrolling in Timpview this year! when I saw her in the halls, I thought of that line from Mean Girls: "She doesn't even go here!" but I was so happy that she decided to go here! and Lynley moved to Oregon over the summer, and she came back to visit all of us! It was so great to see her again.

I was excited for all the new freshmen. some older kids think freshmen are really annoying, but I love them. I am friends with a lot of them, actually! I know lots of them from tennis, and some from junior high as well. but I have missed them a lot. and I just love all of them to bits. and they are all much taller than me, so I could blend in with them and people would think that I'm one of them! but it feels good not to be the youngest anymore. 

on my second day of school last year, I went to a football game. I had no friends, but I found a senior named Ava from my seminary class, and we hung out for most of the game. we talked a lot and she was super nice to me and introduced me to all her friends. this year, I went to a football game on my second day of school again. and I was supposed to meet up with friends, but they didn't show up until later. so I just found Lauren, one of my best friends on the tennis team, who is a senior. this sounds pretty familiar. another really nice senior, introduces me to all her friends, and it was super nice! at around half time, my friends finally showed up. I went off with them for a bit, and at that point, pretty much everyone showed up. i was saying hi to everyone, and I kinda lost track of my friends. then I found my friends Lindsee and Jackson (who are both juniors) and sat with them for the rest of the game. and like last year, Timpview won again. 

Jackson and me at the game. oh and Lindsee didn't quite make the picture.

so it's been an interesting week and 2 days in school. I already have so much homework. all my classes are really hard, except for ceramics, digital photo, and seminary, which I hate to say will probably become my naptime. I have drivers ed every morning at 6:30, and tennis every afternoon. and then I have to practice piano and do homework. so I guess I will kiss my social life goodbye. 

some other interesting things have happened. on Monday, Jackson was driving me home and we had just pulled out of the parking lot, when some girls just hit his car, pulled in front of us, and drove off like nothing happened. thank goodness his sister Kate's friend was able to send her a picture of the license plate, because none of us were quick enough to get a picture! and everyone was ok, including the car. but it was very inconvenient for us, and bad drivers just really piss me off. maybe I shouldn't say that, because I'm not very good myself. but I haven't hit anyone yet, so that's good. but after having this experience, just don't be a bad driver. don't hit other peoples cars. and if you do, please be a really nice person, pull over, and help us and be nice to us. which reminds me. I turn 16 in 146 days. I have 26 days left of drivers ed to complete. I have had my permit since march. it's scary to think I'll be driving. but my parents of course won't let me get a car unless I pay for it myself. so occasionally I can steal my dad's, but I won't be driving myself to school. I guess that's a good thing, because whoever designed the parking lot at timpview is a big idiot. I seriously hate that parking lot. and there's a lot of scary drivers. I can't even pull into my own driveway without hitting the curb. and i'm terrified of hitting anything: children, dogs, other cars, everything. but I gotta learn somehow. even though waking up every morning at 5:45 is very inconvenient. 

after school, my life is pretty much just tennis, tennis, tennis. recently, I pulled a muscle in my right wrist from using it so much, and it has been affecting my ability to play. I did really well in a match last week, even though I lost. yesterday I got killed. I don't even want to say the score. but it was pretty bad. but so far, i've been having a lot of fun this season! even though practices seem to last forever, and it's always super hot, and my wrist is really hurting half of the time. but for the most part, I love it! I love all the girls on the team.

me and Gracie L, my favorite freshman in the world. you've already seen this. get over it.

me and Jen. we didn't even plan, we just wore matching tank tops. I played with her on city league all summer, and we had a great time doing that! I love her guts.

and we can't forget Lauren, my favorite senior. and Grace S. photobombing us in the background!

sorry. more random pictures. on Wednesday, I went on a little hike up in Squaw Peak. the view is beautiful. it was really nice to enjoy the end of summer and the beautiful weather. I am excited for fall, because it's my absolute favorite season. but I don't want the nice summer weather to leave us! I am enjoying seeing all my friends again at school, and some of my classes are really fun, but I already miss summer a lot. I have had a super fun summer. some of the highlights were:

• going to Moab
• going to Youth Conference in Manti
• tennis with mom
• city league tennis
• eating snowcones 
• In-N-Out after pretty much every tennis match
• warm weather
• bear lake with my cousins
• being able to sleep in
• timpview tennis practices
• tennis with Jackson and getting killed everytime. 
• my friend Kalela visiting from Illinois and us hanging out everyday she was here

but then again, I'm kinda excited to be a sophomore this year. I can't wait until I turn 16 and I can start driving. oh, and dating. that's gonna be fun too. and people still ask me everyday if I'm a new freshman. I find it rather amusing. but anyways, let's make it another great year at timpview!